“Shower Him With Rage”
President Armijo
announced today that they will not partake in the nearly ninety-year-old
tradition of Presidents urinating on the grave of Donald Trump. The tradition began in 2037 when President
Hodge performed the act as a “complete and utter refutation of Trump’s policies
and ideas.” Despite being elected as President, Trump tried to rule as a
dictator. Since President Hodge, all
Presidents within a few days of being inaugurated have urinated on Trump’s
grave as a statement that dictators do not belong in the United States.
President Armijo stated
that while despising Trump, they worried “focusing on this bogeyman who died
when my grandparents were kids, takes time away from defeating the current
bogeypeople, some of whom wish to resurrect some of Trump’s failed ideologies.”
They added, “Besides, why should the public be reminded of this man every few
years when what he truly deserves is to fade into obscurity and be forgotten.”
