Suckers for Trump

About a month ago, I came up with a scene I could maybe use in a story.  Basically, a character is walking down the sidewalk, and they see some guy wearing a “I voted for the felon,” t-shirt.  The main character makes a face or something, and this asshole asks, “Does my shirt bother you?” And the main character replies, “Oh, I hear there’s one of you born every minute.” This is a take on the saying, “There’s a sucker born every minute,” often attributed to P. T. Barnum.  I was thinking about this the other night – I still haven’t figured out a story for it – and I wondered how many suckers there really were to vote for Trump?

If a sucker is born every minute, and there are sixty minutes each hour, and twenty-four hours in a day, and 365 days a year, that means there are 525,600 suckers born each year.  If we take 80 years’ worth of suckers to be voters in an election (I know there are people over 98 who vote, but this is all just a quick calculation) that means there were over 42,000,000 suckers who probably voted for Trump.  Since he got over 77,000,000 votes, that means there are some 35,000,000 assholes who actually wanted the racist, treasonous, pedophile to be President. 

My prediction on what will happen when Trump dies

I’m writing a story each month on my website.  Back in March, I had an idea for a “story” that would be a list of what the biggest headline in the US were on a certain day for the next 100 years.  I knew I’d need some time to write it, so the day I picked was June 20th.  The 2025 headline was “Trump assassinated at Anti-Woke rally in Raleigh; gunman killed by Secret Service.” Having an anti-woke rally right after Juneteenth seemed like a thing he would do.  The 2026 headline was “One year later, questions still remain about Trump assassination.” And the 2035 headline was “Ten years after his assassination, the continuing need to eradicate Trumpism.” And those were the only time Trump would be mentioned.  Because, the point of the story was to show that despite all the damage he has done, once he dies he’ll be forgotten.  It’s like how after decades, the deaths of people like Robin Williams and Steve Irwin still hit hard.  Whereas people like Rush Limbaugh and David Koch are quickly and rightfully forgotten.  The same will be with Trump.

But how quickly will the world move on from him?  I predict even before he’s in the ground.  In large part because of the various MAGA factions that will start backstabbing to gain dominance.  What I predict will be some Faction X that will say, “We just learned, and had no prior knowledge, that Trump was a pedophile.  Not only did Faction Y know, they did nothing about it.” Meanwhile, Faction Y will go, “We just learned, and had no prior knowledge, that Trump was embezzling funds.  Not only did Faction X know, they did nothing about it.” We can only hope that these factions will destroy one another, leaving good, decent people that actually care about America to clean up their colossal mess. 

***

In case you’re wondering what happened to my story, well, coming up with headlines ninety years from now turned out to be harder than I thought.  Also, I’ve been a bit under the weather for the last few weeks and haven’t written much.  So about a week ago, I decided I wouldn’t get around to the story.  At least, not this year.  But I also had been thinking about how magats will end up backstabbing each other, so I decided to write this post and release it today instead of the story.

Some of the headlines I’d come up with dealt with wild fires, mass shootings, beloved actors dying in accidents, but I also had some hopeful headlines.  Since those are so rare these days, I figured I’d share some of the ones I came up with. 

2043

German doctors “cure” first patient of Alzheimer’s with MZT treatment.

2048

Mohawk #3, the last coal fired power plant in America, has finally shut down.

2050

First child born on the moon.

2055

President Piña announces she’s pregnant … with twins!

2060

After decades of controversy, Bitcoin finally shuts down.

209X

Scientist report that atmospheric CO2 concentration likely peaked in 209X at X ppm.  (I never got around to finalizing this one.)

Short story – “A Line in the Sand”

“A Line in the Sand”

The video began with a woman of uncertain ancestry in her forties standing on a beach in the shade of some palm trees.  The rustling of the fronds drowned out whatever sound came from the gentle waves.  The woman smiled and began in clear English, but with a bit of a French accent, “My name is Neti Bolak, and I am the President of Tuz.  We are a small nation consisting of a dozen atolls about halfway between Hawaii and The Philippines.  Our economy runs on tourists visiting for our wonderful beaches,” here she indicated the beach behind her, “as well as our clear waters with several sites for snorkeling and scuba diving.  The other main contributor to our economy is the small United States Naval Base located on our northern most atoll.  Many in America have probably never heard of our country until last week when President Trump in an, arguably, rambling post, stated that America should ‘take over’ my nation. 

“Since then, we have used all of our diplomatic means to discover why he would say such a thing and to ask for an apology.  The most common answer we received was that it was just a joke.” President Bolak paused for a moment.  “Threatening to invade my nation when you had promised to protect us and possibly killing scores or hundreds of my civilians.  I’m sorry, what is the joke? 

“The other reason given for his statement was that it was just ‘a negotiating tactic.’ This is where you make an unreasonable demand, knowing that after several rounds of compromise, you’ll end up with what you really wanted, without having to give up anything.  But negotiations over what?  Yes, there were some difficulties between our citizens and the American military in the past, but things have been mutually beneficial between us for the last couple of decades.  So why threated to invade our nation as a negotiation tactic when, as far as I knew, we had no issues being negotiated?”

Standing taller, President Bolak stated, “Our country has been threatened, and our reasonable demands for an apology have been ignored.  That is why I am now giving President Trump an ultimatum.  You have twenty-four hours from the posting of this video to make a video apology to my nation.  If you do not do that, then we will demand the United States military to leave our territory.”

Shrugging, President Bolak continued, “We are not asking for much.  And I want the peoples of America and the world to know that Tuz has no quarrel with any of them.  All that is necessary to end this minor diplomatic fracas, is for one man to set his ego aside and admit he was wrong.  That is all we are asking for.

“Now some will point out that I said the United States military was a major contributor to our economy, so why would I risk damaging my country’s economy?  Well, if we are forced to kick out the Americans, maybe the Chinese could use a naval base.  And perhaps be better guests.”

With a bitter smile, President Bolak finished, “For those saying I’m being overly dramatic, don’t worry, it’s just a negotiating tactic.”

An encouraging sign?

I live in a pretty red part of Pennsylvania.  Like, in 2020 Trump received 78.7% of all the votes in the county, which was an increase from the 78.0% he received in 2016.  In 2020, in my drive to work I saw a dozen or so Trump signs and flags.  And they stayed up, like, in late 2021 there were still a couple yard signs out.  And hardly a week goes by I don’t see some asshole wearing a MAGA hat or an “I’m voting for the felon!” t-shirt at work. 

But back in … June or so I noticed that I was seeing less and less of those people.  And I hadn’t noticed any yard signs.  I was thinking maybe the fever had passed, and I was thinking of writing up a post about how not seeing Trump signs everywhere was an encouraging sign, but I figured I would wait a little closer to the election before doing that.

Then, on July 13th, I was at work and this lady said that Trump had been shot.  I think she had a friend at the rally and wasn’t sure what all was going on.  It was a few minutes before I was able to get to my phone and check the news.  I saw that the bullet had “grazed his ear,” and the first reports I saw listed two dead, and I thought it said as well as the shooter, so I thought three people were dead.  I don’t know if it was just confusion on the developing story, of if I misread the report.

Now, I’m not a fan of Trump, but I don’t want him shot.  For one, I don’t want to make a martyr of the asshole, and two, he deserves to spend the rest of his miserable life locked up in prison.  And three, political assassinations should have no part in a democracy.  Although, I will admit, there were times back in 2016-2020 where I could start to see the appeal.  So I was happy that Trump wasn’t severely wounded, and saddened that three (really two) people were dead.  We’ll probably never know what troubles that kid had, but that wasn’t the way to go about fixing them.

Once I knew Trump was still among the living, I realized my job would become agonizing.  Because I expected all the magats would come out of the woodwork.  A couple years ago, someone had stickers made of Biden saying, “I did that,” and put them on the gas pumps at one of the stations down the street from where I work.  I know this, because some guy found that so goddamned funny, that he took a photo of them, and then had to show that photo to a complete stranger working at a different store.  I could have explained that the President has no control over the price of gas and high gas prices are the results of greedy oil assholes, but what are facts and reason to a Trump supporter?  So after the assassination attempt I expected a constant barrage of MAGA hats and conspiracy theories.  Like the one semi-regular customer who said that the fires in Hawaii a year or two ago were “obviously” caused by an energy weapon as some kind of false flag to convince people climate change was real.  Fortunately, I haven’t seen that guy in like two months, so I thankfully don’t know his thoughts on all of this.

But none of that happened.  I only work Saturdays and Sundays, and I counted the number of Trump hats/shirts I saw.  I didn’t keep track before July 13th, but I would guess I saw one or two each weekend.  And that’s how many I’ve seen each weekend since.  And except for a neighbor putting up a Trump flag, I haven’t seen any new yard signs on my drive to work.  And given how many customers feel the need to talk my ear off about anything, I’ve surprising not heard anyone say anything.  I thought maybe on the 13th, people hadn’t heard about it yet, but I figured it would be nonstop talk on the 14th, but it was if it never happened.

And that’s why I wonder if this is an encouraging sign.  Perhaps the Trump fever has finally broken, and there are just the few, isolated cases of foam-at-the-mouth MAGAtism.  Don’t get me wrong, most of my customers will still vote for Trump in November, because for decades they’ve been told “Republican good, Democrat bad,” and that’s about the extent of their political thinking.  So they’ll still vote for Trump, but they won’t be as excited about it as they were in 2016, or 2020.  Which, while small, is still a step in the right direction.

Jim Trump? Donald Jones?

A couple of months ago, when I stopped for gas, I saw that someone had put a sticker on the pump, and someone else had ripped most of it off.  When I saw it, my first thoughts were, Why did someone make a sticker of Jim Jones and stick it on a gas pump?  Then, after a few seconds of thought and with the help of a second sticker that had different parts of it ripped off, I figured out it had been a sticker of Trump as the Terminator saying, “I’ll be back.” I groaned, and pumped my gas.  I didn’t think to get a picture of it.  The last time I got gas, I ended up at that same pump, and I did take a picture of the sticker, with a bit more of it ripped off.

Apparently, unknown to the magats, if you put sunglasses on Trump, he looks like a notorious cult leader.  Of course, Trump without sunglasses is a notorious cult leader.

A disturbing thought about Putin

This began when I was thinking about that glorious day when a judge bangs their gavel and Trump is sentenced to prison for … whichever crime he’s committed in the past forty years they finally get him on.  And I figured that Trump wouldn’t take well to prison to the point would he offer details on any deal he had with Putin for a lighter sentence.  Given Putin’s history of assassinating political opponents, he wouldn’t have an issue taking out someone planning on squealing.  And let’s be honest, even if the bullet was engraved with “Love Vlad,” and the shooter was caught on tape, in the act, and immediately did a “Heil Putin,” or whatever, the magats would figure that it was really Antifa who killed their beloved leader and they just might start that civil war they’re always talking about.

All of that was disturbing, but then another possibility came to my mind.  Let’s say that Putin’s little war wasn’t going that well.  He could go nuclear, but that might be too difficult to coverup.  He could go biological or chemical, but it might help if there was some … distraction in the West so that his latest war crime isn’t the top story in the news.  And the mass unrest after the assassination of a controversial figure could be just the thing he would need.

To be clear, I am not calling for the assassination of Trump.  I want him to live out the rest of his miserable life in prison.  I would say maybe Putin could be his cellmate, but I seriously expect that it’s only a matter of time before Putin is “accidently” shot – in the back of the head – while “resisting” arrest.

Thoughts on Trump having coronavirus

 My first reaction to the news was Nelson's "Ha Ha!" But then, I hoped he and Melania get better.  Mostly because I want him to stand trial for his numerous misdeeds.  But also because his death would just cause all the rightwing nutjobs to launch a holy war in his name.  And telling them that this was a disease that he didn't take seriously and thus paid the consequences for won't do anything.  Because we all know that if Trump went on live TV and shot himself in the head, there are people who would say - and believe - that he was assassinated by Antifa.  And the dumpster fire is bad enough as it is.

Thoughts on a Space Force

So for the last day or two, people have been making fun of the idea of a Space Force.  I even got in on it.  But in all seriousness, do we need a Space Force?  As far as I know, no.

The job of this theoretical Space Force is currently done by the Air Force.  This includes handling the GPS satellites, military communication satellites, and the security making sure they aren't hacked by foreign powers.  To the best of my knowledge, there hasn't been any major screw up showing the Air Force is so incompetent that these duties need to be taken over by new management.

A case could be made that we might need some Space Force in the future, and it's easier to form it now.  The idea that it's easier to transplant a sapling than a full grown tree.  But what tasks will this Space Force be needed to do in the future? As far as I can see, what the Air Force is currently doing ... only more.  Is that enough justification to make a whole new military branch?

Times are changing.  We are inching towards the era of space tourism.  At first with just suborbital hops, but soon tourists will be going to space hotels.  It's possible that thirty years from now some terrorist will take the tourists in a hotel hostage and someone will need to rescue them, like Executive Decision ... in Space!  But you wouldn't need an entire Space Force for that, just ... Seal Team Infinity?  Although it might be hard to find an entire Seal Team with everyone named Buzz.

If we do make this Space Force, what would the Air Force do?  I mean, the WWII visual of hundreds of bombers with hundreds of fighters escorting them deep into enemy territory to carpet bomb an industrial district doesn't happen anymore.  We're getting to the point where we can have hundreds of drones waiting for a bunch of cruise missiles (fired from ships, which used to shoot at other ships with guns) to take out a country's air defense system before going in and bombing other targets pinpointed by special forces units on the ground.  Getting the military working together as a cohesive whole is the way forward.  Making a new branch of the military, would probably just make that more difficult. 

So, do we have a need for a Space Force?  No.  Would a Space Force make America safer?  No, and the shakeup of the current system might open a window of vulnerability.  A Space Force sounds cool, but that's probably it.

Trump, North Korea, and Nobel

For the past week or so I’ve seen a few post on Facebook and Twitter about people wanting to nominate Trump for the Nobel Peace Prize, basically for “his tough stance forcing North Korea to the peace table.” There is a process for nominating people, but it’s not an online poll or anything like that, so no Peacie McPeaceface.  While some people apparently support this before any peace deal has even been signed or gone into effect (and I wonder how many of these same people criticized Obama’s award in 2009 by saying “He hasn’t done anything yet!”) many see it not as anything dealing with Korea, just some way to legitimize Trump.  And when the Norwegian Nobel Committee awards the Peace Prize to someone else, some Trump supporters will use it as an excuse to cry that it’s a socialist conspiracy to silence conservatives.  As someone who was uneasy with Obama’s win in 2009 and looking back now I think he probably shouldn’t have won it, do I think Trump deserves the Nobel Peace Prize?  Fuck no.

In the past year or so, I’ve seen several articles and videos about North Korea.  One thing that almost all of them say is that the point of North Korea’s nuclear program was to keep the dictatorship alive.  Basically, they were using the millions of civilian and military lives in South Korea, Japan, and even the US as human shields.  “If you try to remove us from power, millions will die.” But given reports that there was a collapse at their test site, their nuclear program may have suffered a major setback.  So what kind of deterrent could they use to stop a potential madman from starting a war to show the Twitterverse how tough he is before the midterms?  Declare peace, perhaps?  Don’t get me wrong, I hope for peace on the Korean peninsula, but doesn’t North Korea have a habit of making promises and agreements, then waiting until the world is focused elsewhere before going back to doing whatever they were doing?  Yes, North Korea says it’s stopping its nuclear and missile tests, but won’t this be the fifth or sixth time they’ve said that?  If there is a peace – that lasts – then yes, someone should get the Nobel Peace Prize.  But I’d say that Moon Jae-in and Kim Jong-un are probably more deserving of it that Trump.

Trump’s mugshot

I had a thought the other day.  If during all these investigations information is found to not only have Congress impeach and remove Trump from office, but also to have criminal charges filed against him, his mugshot will break the internet, among other things.  Every news show – from major cable news channels to Joe Bob’s News Wrap-Up on YouTube – will air it.  It will be the subject of countless vlogs and reaction videos.  It will be the header photo on a million Twitter accounts and every other person on Facebook will change their profile photo to it.  And then the majority of newspapers – not just in the US but around the world – will print it along with countless magazines.  And then there will be the bumper stickers, and the posters, and the T-shirts, and the coffee mugs, and the shot glasses, and people getting it on cakes, and on and on and on.  I mean, all the movies and TV shows that show a college dorm room with a Che Guevara poster will just swap in a Trump mugshot poster.

This raised two questions for me.  One, who owns the rights to mugshots?  I’m just curious because I’m sure Leroy who makes flags with the mugshot replacing the stars will follow the law on the matter.  But more importantly, two, will having the most famous mugshot in history just stroke Trump’s ego?  Or would it be better if – if he’s found guilty – when he goes to jail to just say, “Good riddance,” and let him fade into obscurity?